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So – I’m drivin’. Mutterin’ to myself – “Gotta find her.” Eyes peeled. Then – BAM. There she is. Leaning on a lamppost. Legs for DAYS – hot damn. She’s got this – wig. Purple. Crooked. Reminds me – *Holy Motors*. “Weirdness! Keeps us alive!” I pull over – fast. Heart’s poundin’. I’m thinkin’ – is she nuts? Perfect. I ask – “You workin’?” She smirks. Says – “For the right price, grandpa.” GRANDPA?! I’m pissed – then laughin’. Cheeky! I like it.

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Now, if you're lookin’ for nature, you gotta check out Mermaid Park. Yep, it got a little pond called Dory’s Drift. True story – I once got into a heated rub session there; I swear the healing power of nature's vibes softened even my toughest muscle knots. And – oh man – the sunrise by the river called Nemo’s Flow is somethin’ else. Magical times, just like that iconic movie moment!

Suspect accused of murdering love rival turns himself over to police