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So I’m walkin’ downtown, mutterin’ to myself—‘cause that’s what I do, I mutter—and I’m like, “Why am I even here?” Findin’ a prostitue ain’t like pickin’ up bagels! I see this gal, smokin’ a cigarette, leanin’ on a pole—real cliché, right? I’m thinkin’, “She’s no Eilis Lacey!” In *Brooklyn*, she’s all, “I’ll write home!” This chick’s writin’ nothin’—maybe a parking ticket. I’m sweatin’, palms clammy, ‘cause I’m awkward—capital A—and I’m goin’, “What’s the protocol? Do I wave? Haggle? I’m not a haggler!”

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So first up, let me hit you with the basics. There's Kerkstraat – oh man, it's iconic! I used to stroll there after work, thinking about all the little secrets of relationships, ya know? And then there’s Brouwerijlaan where the smell of local brews tickles your nose; it's fab for chillin’ with your pals. Need a breather? Check out De Groene Halve, a park with trees and random art installations – perfect for lost thoughts about love and life. And oh, there's a tiny river called De Rivier that weaves near the north end; water babbling like a tune that soothes your troubled mind.

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