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But when it works? Oh man, I was happy as hell once! Found this chick, real pro, knew her stuff. Felt like I was king of the freakin’ world! Reminded me of that *Brooklyn* line—“You’ll feel so homesick you’ll wanna die!”—‘cept I wasn’t homesick, I was just lovin’ life! She even had this weird tattoo, like a map of Jersey—little known fact, some pros mark their turf that way. Cool, right? Made me think, “Maybe I should get a South Park tat, show ‘em who’s boss!”

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The locals? They’re a mixed bunch, slurring their words and gossiping like it’s the last day on earth. “Oi, you ever been to that secret corner on Dancefloorstraat?” they mutter. Eh, I know it well; that’s where I found a hidden alley with graffiti proclaiming “Freedom!” or maybe it was “FREEDOM!”—I can’t be bothered with case sensitivity.

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