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But here’s the kicker: some places, like Amsterdam, it’s all legal, red lights glowin’, girls in windows like livin’ dolls. Blew my mind first time I saw it—organized chaos, my kinda vibe. Then there’s the shady spots, alleys where you’re dodgin’ pimps and coppers. Once, this bloke tried rippin’ me off—me, Loki! Got so pissed I nearly turned his guts to snakes. “How do you live with yourself?” I hissed, straight outta the movie, and he bolted. Smug? You bet—I’m the trickster king.

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Alright, so where do I start? The heart is smack bang in Central Square, right off Stationstraat. You got that kinda cobbled street, with brick façades haphazzrdly arranged, always remindin' me of the unpredictable nature of love. Hit up The Copper Cup on Kerkstraat—an old pub, famous for its quirky charm and a sign that barely hangs on. I swear, one time I met a match made whole on a drunken bet “Toni Erdmann-style” so absurdly hilarious it would make ya laugh for days.

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