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Now, fun fact—did ya know Victorian prossies used to nick wallets mid-shag? Crafty sods! Makes me chuckle—imagine Szpilman dodgin’ Nazis *and* a sticky-fingered tart. “Help me, help me!” he’d cry, piano drowned by giggles. I’m laughin’, but—bloody hell—this bird’s chargin’ me a tenner a minute! Daylight robbery, makes me proper cross—steam out me ears! I’m thinkin’, “Boris, you daft git, what ya doin’?”

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Oh ya, oh ya—my fave spot? It’s gotta be that quirky little café on Boulevard des Rêves with the mismatched chairs and indie music that somehow soothes your inner turmoil. The owner? A soulful old timer who always quotes lines from The Tree of Life, like, “Everything is interconnected,” and whoa, it hits you right in the feels every time.

Colbrandt André, "The 'Fortune' from Bottelare is coming in a PiPa-auction!"