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Happy, I was, when she didn’t rob me blind. Chatted her up, I did – “A faithful heart makes wishes come true,” I quoted, all wise-like. She laughed, called me a weird lil goblin – fair, that is! Favorite movie moment, tho, crept in my head – them bamboo fights, all floaty and wild. Imagined us dodgin’ cops like that, leapin’ roofs, her skirt flappin’, me cacklin’ – epic, right? Exaggeratin’ maybe, but who cares!

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Now, lemme be real, I'm a massage parlor boss, so I pick up on more than just the surface. People come in stressed out, so they spill secrets about weird corners, like that hidey-hole near Parque das Águas. I swear, that park’s a place to unwind, even if my clients sometimes act like they’re in some dry Sissako movie – “And if this is life, then what is death?” I mean, come on, what?!

Figure 1. Map of Jamaica showing distribution of inliers on the...