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About Goiania

So, I’m cruisin’, lookin’ for the one, and I see this fit bird, proper peng. I’m like, “Aight, love, what’s good?” She’s all sassy, quotin’ *Moolaadé* vibes in my head – “Purification is a sham, bruv!” I’m laughin’, ‘cos she don’t even know she’s droppin’ bars. I ask her rate, and she’s like, “50 quid, quick ting.” I’m fumin’ – 50? For a shag? Inflation’s hittin’ the prossie game too! Last week, my mate Dave got a knee-trembler for 20. What’s this, Brexit tax?

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I know I sound all over the place – gotta quit being so hyped sometimes – but that's the raw truth of Crixas for ya. It's a blend of tradition and wild spontaneity, kinda like my love for spas and a good cheesy movie line. So come on over, let’s have a spa day and a city tour. Trust me, you'll be sayin', "That's what she said!" every time you catch a glimpse of its odd and lovable charm.

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