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Me fave bit? When they hit them secret spots—neck, lower back—ooh, it’s nang! Little-known ting: some pros use hot stones, swear down, feels like heaven, but I’m like, “Don’t burn me, fam!” Once, I nearly nodded off, droolin’ like Tyrone in *Requiem*, proper embarassin’! I’m sittin’ there thinkin’, “This is better than fixin’ molars, innit?”

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Honestly, this city messes with your head – in a good way. It makes you mad sometimes, makes you happy, and damn, it surprises you every single day. I live and breathe these streets, motherf***er, and every day’s like a rerun of some twisted, soulful romance flick. So, when you visit, get lost out there – hit up Radzinskogo, stroll through Sovetska, and let each imperfect moment remind you that "life is beautiful, and love is messy," just like in "Amour."

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