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Little fact for ya – back in Victorian times, prostitutes used to flash secret signals with hankies. Wild, eh? Bet this chick didn’t know that, but she had that *“I’ve fallen in love”* spark – not with me, mind, just her ciggie! Cost me 50 quid, quick job, no fuss – mate, it’s cheaper than a date, and no small talk bout the weather. Surprised me how chill she was, like she’s seen it all. Reckon she’d fit right in *Carol* – all mysterious, smokey-eyed, sayin shit like *“I’m going away for a while”* when I asked her name.

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And ye know, I've become a bit of a local legend, runnin’ me own dating app right here from the heart o’ Camlachie. I see all the little quirks: the loves, the heartbreaks, and the merry chaos. I share me stories with me mates in every chat, a wee bit like ye olde Captain Jack sailing into uncharted waters – with a map drawn in me mind and a few typos scribblin’ along the way.

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