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About Lucerne

I’m happy as a pig in shit, ‘cause she’s cheap – ten quid, bargain! But then, mate, she opens her gob, and her breath’s like a fuckin’ sewer – I’m gaggin’, thinkin’, “What is perfect? Nothin’s perfect!” Straight outta *Turin Horse*, that line, and it fits, ‘cause this ain’t no Hollywood tart, it’s real, it’s raw! Made me angry, though – why’s it always the skanks that find me? Where’s the class birds at?

Escorting the Escort

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First off, there's Hauptstrasse. Yeah, that main street runnin' right thru the town centre, bustlin’ with quirky shops and cafes—hey, I remember one date where, ugh, they spilled coffee everywhere. Hmm… and then there's the gem of a park, Aarepark, lying all chill by the Aare River. I was so stoked when I first discovered it; perfect spot for walkies, ya know?

Washington University students attend the 2022 UN Climate Change Conference in a week-long trip to Egypt