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About Lausanne

So, findin’ a prossie—tricky biz, innit? We shall never surrender to the coppers or the dodgy pimps! Back in the day—little known fact—Victorian London had 80,000 workin’ girls. Blimey, that’s a bleedin’ army! Now, it’s all online—apps, ads, X posts—search “escorts near me” and boom, you’re in the game. Costs ya £50 to £200, dependin’ on how posh ya wanna go. Me? I’m cheap—£50 and a pint’ll do!

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you can’t miss the river Spurenfluss that slices through the city. its banks are lined with paths, benches, and weird little sculptures that protest our modern chaos – just like i always say, "Billionaires should not exist!" walk there and let the water remind ya of life’s little rhythms. i get so excited here sometimes, like, i nearly burst into a passionate Bernie rant, hehe.

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