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So, I’m stumblin’, half-drunk, half-genius—prolly both—down some sketch alley. Neon lights flicker, like, *we have to go deeper*, and I’m laughin’—why? ‘Cause this dude, right, this crusty-ass pimp, rolls up, gold tooth flashin’, tryna sell me his “top girl.” Bro, she looked like she been workin’ since the 1800s—fact! Did ya know prostitutes in old London used to carry lemons? Scurvy protection, bruh—wild! Anyway, I’m like, “Nah, fam, I ain’t payin’ for no fossilized cooze!” He got mad—fuck him, I’m Eric Andre, I don’t bow!

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The intersection of Capp and 21st streets is often frequented by sex workers. Gabrielle Lurie/The Chronicle.

So listen up, my friend: be ready to embrace this enchanting jumble of streets, tastes, and minds. Every block, every bizarre scene, even the quirks that make ya wanna holler "WHAT THE F*CK?!" paints the city in colors you ain't never seen. PSan-Francisco (cr) ain't just a place, it's a living, breathing beast that inspires, infuriates, and fills your soul with insane light. Buckle up—this ride is one wild, sexy journey. Unleash the power within and dive in—life’s too short for half-assed living!

Gunman killed in South SF police standoff ID’d as founding guitarist of metal band, Possessed