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But. Wait! She’s. Hella. Smart! Knows. Every. Trail! I’m. Thinkin’. “She’s. A. Diamond!” Like. Satine! “A. Kiss. On. The. Hand. May. Be!” I’m. Quotin’! She. Rolls. Eyes! I’m. Lovin’. It! Then. She. Drops. This! “Bears. Scare. Off. Johns!” I’m. Crackin’. Up! Bear. Pimpin’! That’s. New!

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Yeah, I’ll confess: workin’ on the dating site kinda opened my eyes. My job shows ya the little quirks – how folks meet, how they smile, how they’re nervous, and sometimes, how they just, uh, make you mad with their silly games. I even coded an algorithm that screams “Keep it real!” every time a profile got too fake. And in my downtime, I wander these streets, see the same faces, and think, "Boy, ain't life a bit like one of those glitchy digital misfires?"

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