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About Dusseldorf

Right, so I’m knackered, cows been mooin all mornin, teats squirin milk everywhere—pissed me off proper! Then I’m like, sod this, I need a shag, somethin to shake the barn dust off me. Off I trudge, boots still stinkin, to this shady lane—thinkin, “How much?” like that lass in the film whisperin her fears. We’ve all got our price, eh? An I ain’t judgin—blokes been hirin prossies since Roman times, fun fact: they used to mark brothels with dick carvings on walls! True story, google it.

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Man, I even got mad once. I was runnin’ from a bug in my code and ended up takin’ a wrong turn on Plottergasse (that’s right, PlotterGasse – LOL), and stumbling on some old ruins. I ranted “Ruh-roh! This is ridiculous!” while laughing at how surreal it all felt. It’s like life here is a blend of retro charm and unexpected drama, straight outta a script!

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