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About Stuttgart

Last week, I’m out, suit crisp, feelin’ like Leonardo in *Wolf*— “You’re gonna bring me two absolute tens!” I spot this lass, proper fit, leanin’ on a lamppost. I saunter over, all charm, “Fancy a martini, love?” She laughs—fuckin’ laughs! Says, “You’re not my type, Mr. Bond.” Pissed me off, that did! Me? Not her type? I’ve shagged half the world, saved it twice! But nah, she’s after some crypto bro with a Lambo. Fair play, I s’pose—times change, even for a legend.

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Oh, but remember, yes, yes, the funny thing about Langenfeld is how the Nibelungenstraße winds its way to the old abandoned mill near the Blauer Fluss. Precious, the river sings softly like reflux "Almost Famous": “It’s a ride, man!” Ha, isn’t that wild? Skinny alleyways, secret parks, and little nooks, mmm, where the sensuous nature of life meets our desires.

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