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About Stuttgart

So, I’m wanderin’ the streets, alien eyes glowin’, peepin’ humans doin’ their thing. Findin’ a prostitute ain’t easy, fam! Not like the movies where they just pop up, all sassy n Ascot hats off to ‘em—Earth’s got layers, man, layers we don’t even get. Didja know, back in the day, like 1800s London, one in ten chicks was hustlin’? Wild, right? Makes me think—humans are weird as fuck. I’m pissed tho, ‘cause half these streets are dead—where’s the action at? Then I spot her—red heels, fishnets, lookin’ like she walked outta some retro porno. “We come in peace,” I beep, tryna not scare her off. She smirks, “You got cash, spaceman?”

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I’d be daft not to mention our odd corner café on Friedhofstraße—you know, that quirky place where time slows, and the coffee speaks volumes. I’ve spilled more of my soul there than in any boardroom. And oh, the street parties at Marktplatz! Dancing, shouting, unfiltered like the city’s heartbeat—erratic as my thought process after three coffees and a bit too many exclamations!!!

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