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Funniest thing? This one time, I’m negotiatin’, and she’s like, “No kissing, only business.” I laugh, “What am I, yer boyfriend?” She didn’t get it—stone cold, like Bigelow filmin’ a torture scene. Oh, and get this: some work outta “massage parlors”—total front. Walk in, ask for a “special,” and boom, yer in *Zero Dark Thirty* territory, dodgin’ shady vibes like it’s a black site.

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The city park, Stadtpark Radolfzell, is my rad date spot, you know? I sometimes meet cool peeps there for a jog. The trees in the park, so old and wise, like they whisper secrets of the past, and oh boy, they are amazngy vibrant im summer n fall. Ugh, sometimes I get mad at the joggers who trail off shouting, “Go, go, go!” and then others like me think, “Hey, chill dude!”

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