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About Essen

So I’m chattin’ her up, right? She’s sassy, calls me “big dog,” and I’m dyin’ laughin’. “Dance with me,” I’d say, noddin’ to *Fish Tank*, but she’s like, “Cash first, mutt.” Fair, fair – I respect the hustle. Surprised me how chill she was, tho – thought she’d be all sketchy. Guess I’m just a goofy pup in over my head. Exaggeratin’ a lil, maybe, but dude, it felt like a movie scene – me, her, the streetlights buzzin’.

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So come on over, buddy. Experience our cobbled streets, quirky cafes on Hauptstraße, heartfelt smiles on every corner and that spirit of "Finding Nemo" – lose and find in the sea of life. Such a city, such a life, so deep, so fun – with mishaps, laughs, and oh so many kinda-typos moment, yet heartfelt, very nice!

German town to DNA test all dogs in fight against fouling