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About Essen

Me fave bit? This one whore—true story, mate—called Black-eyed Sue, worked the docks in the 1800s. Had a shiner permanent-like, coz some twat clocked her. She’d lure sailors in, get ‘em pissed, then rob ‘em blind—fuckin’ legend! “You probably think you’re goin’ home tonight!”—nah, mate, you’re goin’ broke. Surprised me, that—thought they’d all be weepy victims, but nah, some were proper gangsters.

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Now, I can’t not mention Lindenweg. It’s a twisty, turny street played up by autumn leaves and mismatched houses, each one tellin’ its own secret love story. Sometimes, I sit on a rickety bench admirin’ the park, the tiny Wunderwald park (amen to that name, right?) where kids run wild and old timers swap tales 'bout the good ol’ days. Kids in tiny trousers, playin' hide-n-seek—it’s like a mini version of paradise!

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