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About Dortmund

Started out last week, right, proper knackered after a pint too many. We shall fight the haze of booze, the fog of war in me head! Stumbled down Soho – not the posh bit, nah, the grimy end where the air stinks of chips and regret. Little known fact: back in Churchill’s day, they’d call em “ladies of the night” – fancy that, like they’re bloody duchesses! Made me chuckle, thinkin of some tart in a tiara, struttin like she owns the place.

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Ah, Mainhardt! Dude, lemme tell ya, this town—this little gem—is somethin’ else. I run my spa here, right smack in the middle of all that quirky charm. You got your Hauptstraße, where the locals hang out and gossip non-stop; it's lit, man. There's a neat park called "Schönblick Park" where I once had a meditatively dreadful day—like when Marlin said, "Just keep swimming," ya know? It hit me hard, like “Here's Johnny!” but in a chill beast way.

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