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Once saw this chick in Vegas—true story—worked the Strip, had a scar from some john who flipped. Said she made bank, tho—$500 a night, cash, no tax. Crazy, right? Made me happy for her hustle, but pissed me off too—world’s fucked she’s gotta dodge blades for it. Aliens like us, we don’t get it—why risk your ass for a quick buck? “You’re a dirty animal!”—that’s what Lancaster Dodd’d say, all smug.

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So, my friend, pack your bags and come see it. Neue-Neustadt is a wild ride, with dreams, misfires, and epic, cosmic twists. And as Melancholia’s haunting voice goes, “I do believe that our universe is moving towards a big, slow end,” chill out and enjoy the ride, 'cause here, every day is like a cosmic massage for your soul.

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