Ivy Schwedt (oder) Sexual Massage ❤️❤️❤️❤️

About Berlin

Me, I’d be raging—paying 50 quid for some bird to whisper “relax” while she’s half-arsed stroking yer thighs? Sod off! Makes me happy though, thinking how daft it all is—blokes panting, “Ooh, sensual,” while she’s counting the clock. Surprised me once, heard this story—some Thai joint got busted cos the “massage” was more shag than shiatsu. Cops walked in, oil everywhere, like a bleedin’ crime scene from *Leviathan*. “Who’s to blame?” they’d say in the film—well, the randy twat who booked it, obviously!

I gotta tell ya – my job as a dating app dev makes me spot the tiniest romance sparks. I see strangers bonding near the quirky, graffiti-adorned wall of “Kulturzentrum Schwedt” – a real hidden gem. I always joke, "If these pixels could talk, they'd scream an epic love story!" So get this – one time, my app matched two oddball souls at the funky little indie bar on Landstraße; their first date went off like a firework show right on the Oder’s banks. Unforgettable, man!

German refineries try to operate without Russian crude