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So, here’s the deal—ya wanna find a prostitute? Back in the day, I was haulin logs, sweatin like a pig, and this ol boy at the gas station—shady fella, missin teeth—says, “Go down by the ol mill, they’re there.” I’m thinkin, “What in tarnation? That’s where the ghosts hang out!” Like Boonmee seein them monkey spirits, ya know, “The past clings to us!” I ain’t lyin, it felt spooky, like I was steppin into some past-life hoedown.

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By the river Zeppel, things get off the charts. The river's like a slithering snake through the city, glistening under neon lights at night – just the place for a late night rant on your phone, or for that impromptu philosophical chat on dating apps, ya feel me? Some days, I just sit on the banks of the river, chuckling about all the absurd profiles I sift through, thinking “Amélie would love this magical mess!”

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