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So, I’m scrollin’ Tinder, horny as fuck—bam, match! Chick’s profile says “no hookups,” yeah right. Greed kicks in, I’m thinkin’, “That’s a scalp!” Slide into DMs, smooth as Brad Pitt with that accent. “Ever seen *Inglourious Basterds*?” I ask. She’s like, “Love Tarantino!” Boom, we’re vibin’. Next thing, we’re sex-datin’, no bullshit. Greed is good, man—it pushes ya.

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Hmmm... I might've mentioned too many roads already. But, oh man, the local river, Glistrup Å, is a slice of heaven. Its banks are perfect for a fast walk – mmm, nature on prime display! I even once helped a friend sort out her feelings while the gentle flow whispered "Ride on, ride on!" like a desert warrior running from her past.

Ida Mathilde Steensgaard: perfect day of training