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About Copenhagen

So, anyway—me, Gollum, I’m sneaky, seein’ what normies miss. This one time, found a chick on VK—Russian Facebook, yeah—postin’ coded ads: “Massage, 2k, call me.” Massage my arse! Hiss! Rang her up, met in some dingy flat—smelled like borscht and regret. She was quick, tho—no chit-chat, just biz. “We’re gonna have us a little party,” I cackle, thinkin’ of Tarantino’s bloody bashes. Paid her, done, out—felt like a spy, precious! Exaggeratin’? Maybe—but it’s Russia, everythin’s a damn drama.

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I work massaging folks all day, and let me tell ya, my hands pick up on the city's pulse. I get that vibe in every crack, each smile, every tiny park bench. Like on Østergade, near that odd little café on the corner – gotta say, its aroma clocks my senses every time. Felt like Amélie herself was playin’ around there, scheming her little pranks, “C’est la vie, baby!”

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