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About Murcia

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially this damn topic—findin’ a prostitute. Makes my skin crawl, but here we go. Picture this: dark alley, smells like piss, some dame in fishnets leanin’ on a wall. Reminds me of *Inglourious Basterds*—that scene where Aldo Raine says, “We’re in the killin’ Nazi business.” Except here, it’s me, in the “avoidin’ hookers business.” Hate it. Hate the neon lights flashin’—red, blue, screamin’ sex for sale. Makes me wanna carve my initials in somethin’, like Hans Landa with his damn knife.

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Ya know, as a pleasure coach, I notice all them little details. The way the old bricks in Barrio Sol reflect the golden hours, the soft hum of locals chattin’ on Calle Luna – even that random, grumpy old nun turned out to be a secret poet. Crazy right? Rarrgh!

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