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About Valencia

Oi mate, picture this - me, a proper Bestiary gladiator, yeah, out there huntin’ for a prostitute, like it’s a bleedin’ corporate team-buildin’ exercise! Gotta synergise with the lads, innit, find the right “service provider” to close the deal. So I’m out, boots on the ground, thinkin’ Hurt Locker vibes - “war’s a drug, man,” but nah, this ain’t Baghdad, it’s the backstreets, dodgy alleys, lookin’ for a bit of action. Sweatin’ like a numpty, heart’s racin’ - boom, there’s the target! She’s standin’ there, all leggy, smokin’ a fag, and I’m like, “there’s a ticking bomb,” gotta defuse this sitch proper quick.

Welcome to LJ Hooker Cabramatta

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Then, like, there's another amazing spot, Barrio del Sol. It’s, like, a small neighborhood where the streets are twisting in this mad way – it’s like, “You know, nothing is built according to a plan, and that's, like, a real lesson in randomness.” I once had a client, like, scream "I think I'm trapped in a Coen movie!" while we were, like, enjoying the imperfect beauty of the tangled streets and hidden murals. So surreal!

NAMA chief charging tourists €10,000 a week for Cabra home