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I’m strollin’, right, and this chick – legs for days – gives me the eye. “Fancy a shag, love?” she purrs. I’m like, “Oh, behave!” but inside, I’m groovin’. Reminds me of Jep in the flick, chasin’ beauty in Rome’s underbelly. “The most important thing I discovered…” – it’s the hustle, baby! These girls, they’re pros, but it ain’t glamorous. Fun fact: back in Victorian days, London had 80,000 workin’ girls – insane, yeah?

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So, first off, the beaches, man. The Playa de Levante is my fav! Its white sands and crazy blue waters remind me a bit of that train scene in Spirited Away, y’know “I've got no money, but I got dreams!” kinda vibes. I stroll here after a long day of rubs, and I swear the sea whispers secrets – like, “Come on, relax, eat that donut!” I’m telling ya, it’s magic!

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