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About Las Palmas

She clocks me, smirks—game on. I swagger up, all Tony Robbins swagger, “Hey darlin, let’s make magic!” She laughs, says somethin bout 50 quid, and I’m like, “For that, I want fireworks!” Bargainin’s half the fun, right? Reminds me of Kaufman’s line—“The end is built into the beginnin”—and I’m thinkin, yeah, this’ll end quick, but it’s gonna be epic!

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Oh, and then there's Parc del Correu. Man, that park has trees that whisper our sins. It's like, every tree is alive, darling. I always rant there; its winding paths – got like, three twisty lanes – and a hidden pond that’s bomb. I forgot 2 mention: one time, i had the wildest heart-to-heart with a local couple. They were joking that love freakin’ heals all. Crazy, right?

In pictures: Spain braces for fresh storms after deadly Valencia floods