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Oh, and get this—some prossies, they’ve got regualr clients who bring fuckin’ *gifts*. Flowers, choccie, weird shit like that. One bird told me she got a toaster once! A toaster! What’s she gonna do, shag him and make toast? Cracked me up, that did—mental image of her pluggin’ it in mid-job. “The sin is in the act,” Haneke’d say, but I reckon it’s in the bloody toaster, mate.

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I remember one mad day – swore I was exploding with anger as I saw a couple arguing near Ristiankylä park. I mean, come on, the vibe’s gotta be mellow, no? But then, just like a scene outta that movie – “I'm so sorry,” they both burbled, and everything changed. Ain't it strange? Such emotions, everyday life!

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