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About Paris

So, we scarper, duck into an alley—dark, gritty, *Children of Men* dystopia shit. She’s giggles, I’m sweatin’, thinkin’ “This bird’s a riot!” She’s tellin’ me how prossies dodge the coppers—tip: wear a wig, switch it up! Genius, yeah? I’m happy now, buzzin’—Ruby’s a gem, a real dolly bird. “You’re my miracle, Kee!” I blurt, all dramatic-like, channelin’ that movie soul.

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Then, I see this dude, right? He’s got a pig on a leash. A freakin’ pig! I’m like, “Bro, I’m the swineherd here!” But he’s all smug, like he’s the king of Torcy or somethin’. I’m fuming. I mean, who walks a pig in the park? I’m about to say something, but then I remember my mom’s advice: “Don’t start fights you can’t finish.” So, I just roll my eyes and keep walking.

Soccer: Small clubs cross fingers for World Cup windfalls