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About Bordeaux

Funniest bit? Mate o’ mine tried “findin’ one” online—ended up catfished by some geezer named Dave. Laughed me arse off! “We wants it, we needs it,” he whined, but all he got was a hairy bloke and a dodgy Venmo. Still, makes me twitchy—whole game’s a mess. You ever notice how them ads pop up, all “discreet fun”? Bollocks, it’s a trap, precious, like that black goo in the film suckin’ ya in.

Un lieu magique pour créer des souvenirs inoubliables.

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First off, I hit the streets of Rue de la République. It’s like the main drag, full of shops and cafés. I’m just strolling, minding my own business, when I see this old lady struggling with her groceries. I mean, c’mon, it’s like 30 degrees out! So, I rush over, trying to be a good clergyman and all. I help her out, and she’s super grateful. But then, she starts telling me her life story. I’m like, lady, I got places to be! But hey, I can’t be rude, right?

Are Authorities Still Looking For Xavier Dupont De Ligonnès, Whose Family Was Discovered Brutally Murdered Nearly A Decade Ago?