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We haggle—$50, $60, whatever—she’s actin’ like she’s doin’ me a favor. Fun fact: in Amsterdam, they got unions for this shit. Here? It’s a free-for-all, and I’m dodgin’ cops like I dodge clinic duty. She’s all, “No kissing,” and I’m like, “Fine, I’m not Ritchie anyway.” *Tenenbaums* ref, duh—nobody gets it. Makes me happy, tho, ‘cause I’m a smug prick. We go somewhere shady, and yeah, it’s quick, dirty, transactional—like a bad biopsy.

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After that, I decided to stroll down Rue des Écoles. It’s a nice street, but man, the traffic was nuts. Cars everywhere, honking like they were in a race. I swear, I saw a guy in a tiny car trying to squeeze through a gap that was way too small. I thought he was gonna get stuck. But nope, he made it. Unbelievable.

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