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Prostitutes—ooh, they’re like the vampires in my fave flick, *Only Lovers Left Alive*. “We’re still here, darling,” they’d say, struttin’ through history, oldest job ever, right? Kinda wild—didja know ancient Babylon had temple hookers? Sacred sexy time, whoa! Blows my square lil’ mind. Makes me happy, tho—humans bein’ all creative with survival. “This blood tastes funny,” I’d giggle, imaginin’ some crusty priest tippin’ gold coins.

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Then, outta nowhere, this dude runs up to me. He’s all frantic, yelling about his cat stuck inside. I’m like, “Dude, focus! We gotta get people out first!” But he’s not having it. I can’t believe it, but I actually end up sending one of my guys to rescue the cat. I mean, priorities, right?

Rhodes fires: Attleborough dad tells of tourist rescue runs