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Oh, and the oils? Smell like heaven—lavender, ylang-ylang, whatever that is. Fun fact: Romans used saffron oil—cost a fortune! Extravagant bastards. Me, I’d charge—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!”—for that premium shit. Adds to the vibe, tho—makes ya feel fancy, not just horny.

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After that, I head over to the market on Fő utca. It’s packed, as usual. I’m dodging people, trying not to trip over some old lady’s cart. She’s got like 20 bags of potatoes. I’m thinkin’, “What’s she doin’ with all those spuds?” Anyway, I grab a quick snack—some langos, you know? Deep-fried goodness. I’m munching away, and this kid runs by, knocks my langos right outta my hand! I’m like, “Hey, watch it, mini tornado!”

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