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Funniest bit? Some punters reckon it’s “spiritual” – bruv, it’s a posh wank! Call it what it is! Ain’t no guru vibes, just a fit bird actin’ like she’s fixin’ your soul. Cracked me up, dat did. Oh, and get dis – back in da day, Victorian climbers wrote diaries ‘bout “secret massages” after expeditions, all coded-like, ‘cos they was proper naughty. Historians found dat shit years later – bare scandal!

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Before reviewing the best erotic massage parlors in Manila, let’s understand what an erotic massage is: it’s a massage that ends with a handjob or blow job or full sex. Keep in mind that .

First off, I hit up the local bakery on Kossuth Lajos utca. Best pastries ever! I grab a couple of those fluffy lángos things. You know, the fried dough with garlic and sour cream? Heaven! But then, I spill half of it on my shirt. Great start, right? I’m walking around looking like a walking garlic bomb.

Fig. 4. Multiclavula mucida in reserve 'Tinovul Mare Poiana Stampei'...