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So, findin’ a prostitute—where do ya even start? Back in the day, pre-internet, ya had to know a guy—like, some greasy fella in a bar whisperin’, “Psst, go to 5th and Main.” Now? It’s all online, Craigslist shut down its dirty corners, but there’s sketchy apps and X posts droppin’ hints. Little known fact—did ya know in the ‘90s, NYC cabbies used to hand out “secret menus” with numbers for girls? Wild, right? Made me angry—those fat-cat taxi moguls profited off desperation! Billionaires should not exist!

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But wait! I remember the festival! I grab my coat and head out. The streets are slick, but I’m dodgin’ puddles like a pro. I get to the river, and it’s packed. Food stalls everywhere, music blarin’. I’m feelin’ the energy. I grab a langos, and it’s the best thing I’ve ever tasted. Seriously, Domsod knows how to do street food.

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