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Oi mate, so I’m Creative Director now, yeah? Gotta spiel about erotic-massage – brilliant! Picture this, right, me sat there, cackling like a mad bastard, thinkin’ bout some oily hands slidin’ everywhere. Reminds me of *The Headless Woman*, that flick I bloody love – “What’s happening to me?” she says, all dazed, lost in her posh little crisis. That’s me, first time I stumbled into one of these parlours, right? Didn’t know if I was gettin’ a rubdown or a bloody interrogation!

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud commotion. I turn around, and there’s a street performer doing some crazy juggling act. Like, how does he not drop anything? I’m clapping, laughing, and feeling all the good vibes. But then, this kid runs by and knocks over the performer’s stuff. Total chaos! The guy’s face was priceless. I felt bad, but I couldn’t help but laugh.

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