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Little known fact—did ya know prostitutes in old France, like way back, sometimes hid in haystacks? Farmers’d be like, “Who’s rustlin my crops?!” and bam, there’s Jeanne or whoever, chargin a nickel. True story—well, prolly. Makes me happy thinkin bout it, history’s wild! But then I get mad—why’s it gotta be so sketchy now? Shady alleys, creepy dudes—ugh, hate that vibe.

Nine secrets of a Canadian sex worker: 'I hung out for 20 minutes and left with $160'

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The festival is lit! Food stalls everywhere, music blasting, people dancing. I’m in heaven. I grab some sate (satay) and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m dancing like nobody’s watching, even though they totally are.