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Eh, what’s up, doc? So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, ya know, like some real shady stuff. Bein’ an actuary, I crunch numbers all day, but this? This ain’t no spreadsheet, pal! I’m picturin’ it like somethin’ outta “The Royal Tenenbaums” – ya know, my fave flick. Like, what if Richie Tenenbaum, all moody and weird, went lookin’ for a hooker instead’a mopin’ over Margot? “I’m going to lose my mind,” he’d say, but with a dame on his arm, heh!

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But then, just as I’m about to get back to work, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some dude just backed his car into a pile of bricks. I’m like, “Seriously? In Sabang?!” The guy jumps out, all panicked, and I can’t help but laugh. Like, bro, you just wrecked your ride in front of a bunch of construction workers. Classic.

Alleged scammer posing as first family relative falls in Guimaras