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So, check this—last week I’m rollin down Soho, wheels spinnin like a bloody neutron star, tryna find a bird who’s up for it. Streets smellin like piss an cheap perfume—lovely, innit? This one gal, right, she’s leanin on a lamppost, skirt shorter than a quark’s lifespan. I’m like, “Oi, love, how much?” She squints at me chair—thinks I’m takin the piss. Mate, I was fumin! “Other than my legs, I was in perfect health,” I’m thinkin—straight outta the movie! Me brain’s sharper than a bleedin supernova, don’t judge me wheels!

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First stop, Jalan Yos Sudarso. I’m cruisin’ down the street, and boom! Traffic jam. Like, seriously? It’s not even rush hour! I’m sittin’ there, fuming. I see this dude on a motorbike, zippin’ through the chaos like he’s in a Fast & Furious movie. I’m like, “Bro, chill! You ain’t Vin Diesel!”

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