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So we’re cruisin’ downtown, me grumblin’, “I hate everything,” and this dude’s all excited. Thinks it’s easy—ha! You gotta dodge cops, weirdos, and those sketchy ads online. Saw one once, blurry pic, “discreet fun, $100.” Looked like my aunt’s chihuahua in a wig. Laughed my ass off, then got mad—waste of my damn time. Prostitutes ain’t just standin’ on corners anymore, nope. They’re sneaky, got apps, secret X posts—searched some, found jack squat. Surprised me, honestly. Thought it’d be simpler, like orderin’ a steak.

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So, I’m walking down the street, and I see this massive poster for a local gig at the Athy Heritage Centre. I mean, c’mon, who doesn’t love a good local band? I’m all about supporting the scene. But then, I notice the date is wrong! Like, seriously? How do you mess that up? I was fuming! I mean, I’m here to promote, not fix other people’s messes.

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