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So, picture this—I’m strollin’ downtown, right? Thinkin’ ‘bout that movie, how Juliette Binoche just messes with your head—bam, I see this gal, all dolled up, leanin’ on a lamppost. “Are you authentic?” I wanna ask, like in the film, but c’mon, Joe, don’t be a dope. I ain’t no fancy art dealer—just a guy who’s seen some shit. Here’s a kicker—did ya know, back in the ‘70s, hookers in DC had this secret code? Whistled twice if the fuzz was near. Blew my mind when I heard that—straight outta a spy flick!

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So, I finally get my food, and I’m ready to chow down. But then, I see this dog. A big ol’ golden retriever, just chilling. I’m thinking, “Aww, what a cutie!” But then it runs straight for my chips! I’m like, “Noooo!” I’m waving my arms like a madman. The owner’s laughing, and I’m just there, half-heartedly trying to protect my meal.

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