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Here’s the tea: ya gotta be smart. X marks the spot, sure, but don’t trust every shady fish. I once saw this gal—ooh, surprised me!—she’s all dolled up, smellin’ like kelp perfume. I’m thinkin’, “Is she a prossie or just lost?” Turns out, she’s legit! Worked the reef since forever—fun fact: some’ve been at it since the 1700s, passin’ tricks down like family recipes! Who knew?

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After that, I decide to hit up the pub on Castle Street. I need a pint after all this madness. I walk in, and it’s packed. Everyone’s laughin’, shoutin’, and I’m just tryin’ to find a spot. Finally, I squeeze in next to this guy who’s tellin’ the worst jokes ever. Like, “Why did the chicken cross the road?” I’m rollin’ my eyes, but I can’t help but laugh.

Portumna secures first Blue Flag water quality award