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But then—surprise twist! Coppers roll by, lights flashin like pulsars. She bolts faster than light speed, leavin me there, gobsmacked. “The sea’s treasures are my only hope,” I mutter—movie line, yeah? ‘Cept my treasure’s legged it! Fumin again—why’s the universe gotta cockblock a genius? Reckon it’s karma for somethin—maybe I pissed off a galaxy once.

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Anyway, I finally make it to my workshop on Church Street. It’s a cozy little spot, filled with the smell of wood shavings and metal. I love it. But today? Today was a different beast. I’m workin’ on this fancy stove for some posh family in Castle Street. They want it to be all shiny and stuff. I’m like, “Dude, it’s a stove, not a trophy!” But whatever, I’m a pro, right?

Death Notice of Eileen Dunbar (née O'Neill) (Gorey, Wexford)