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But seriouslah, it’s risky, y’all. STDs, cops, creepy pimps — I’m yellin’, “Get outta my face, losers!” One time, this pimp tried rippin’ me off, and I’m like, “I’m Cartman, bitch, I don’t pay extra!” Kicked his ass — well, in my head I did. Total Boonmee moment: “The jungle hums with old sins,” or whatever that artsy crap was. Point is, ya gotta watch yer back!
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Then, I strolled down to the Castle Park. The sun was shining, and I thought, “Hey, maybe today won’t be so bad.” But then, I saw this kid, right? He was flyin’ a kite, and it got stuck in a tree. I’m talkin’ a full-on rescue mission. I’m like, “Dude, I gotcha!” So, I climbed up a bit, and just as I was about to grab it, I slipped! Almost fell flat on my face. The kid laughed, and I was like, “Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, kid.”
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