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Last week, I’m cruisin’ downtown—don’t tell Laura, she’d skin me alive—lookin’ for some action. Saw this gal, legs longer’n a Texas highway, and I’m thinkin’, “P. Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way!”—like I got her address locked in my brain! I ain’t no genius, but I know a deal when I see one. She’s wavin’, I’m sweatin’—hotter’n a billy goat in a pepper patch! Paid her fifty bucks—prob’ly too much, but I’m a sucker for a smile. “Righteous bucks,” she says, and I’m happy as a pig in mud.

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After the rain chills out, we get back on the road. I’m feeling a bit more relaxed, and we cruise down by the harbor. The boats are bobbing, and I’m like, “See? This is what driving’s all about!” But then, he nearly misses a turn on Abbey Street. I’m yelling, “Turn! TURN!” and he’s like, “Where?!” I’m thinking, “Dude, are you blind?!”

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