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Ooh, and here’s a juicy bit—escort ain’t just cars! Nope! There’s, uh, “companions”—wink wink! I blushed, honest! “The Tree of Life” vibes hit me—“Love everyone, every leaf, every ray!”—even escorts? Hmm… maybe! I ain’t judgin’, but Selma’d say, “Trashy!” Me? I’m like, live and let live! Still, surprised me—didn’t expect that twist!

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Next up, this dude gets in. He’s got a pizza box. A whole pizza! I’m like, “Bro, you can’t eat in here.” But he’s like, “Chill, it’s just a slice.” So, I’m stuck smelling pepperoni all the way to the 5th floor. I’m drooling, but also mad. Like, who eats pizza in an elevator?

Uprooted: Hadas Lahav, 40, from the northern moshav of Shtula. This is her story