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About Jerusalem

So I’m like, right, where’s the action? *slips on wet pavement* Wotcha! Nearly ate the curb there. Anyway, findin a prossie—takes guts, innit? You gotta dodge the coppers, *whispers* “lurkin like coyotes in the fog.” Saw this one bird, proper fit, leanin on a lamppost—thought, “Blimey, she’s a sort!” *wiggles eyebrows* But then—bam!—some geezer nicks me wallet! Made me mad as a hatter, steamin I was!

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Then, this one guy gets in, and he’s all decked out in Bat-Hefer gear. I’m talkin’ T-shirt, cap, the whole shebang. He’s like, “I love this city!” I’m like, “Yeah, me too, but can you not yell?” He’s so pumped, he starts talking about the Bat-Hefer Festival coming up. I’m like, “Dude, I’m just trying to get through my shift.” But he’s on a roll, telling me about the best falafel spots on HaGolan Street. I’m like, “Okay, I’ll check it out.”

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