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Oi, precious! Brothels, eh? Nasty, filthy places! Me thinks they’re wild, like untamed mountains. Reminds me of *Brokeback Mountain* – “I wish I knew how to quit you!” – but with more moaning, heh! Dirty hobbitses paying for a tumble, disgusting! Saw one once, sneaky-like, in some grimy town. Ladies with painted faces, struttin’ round. “Stupid, fat hobbit!” I yells in me head – they don’t even notice the stink!

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First off, I hit the streets of HaSharon. I’m cruising, coffee in hand, feeling like a boss. But then, bam! Traffic jam outta nowhere. Like, c’mon! It’s not rush hour! I’m stuck behind some dude in a beat-up old car. I mean, seriously, how does that thing even run? I’m fuming, thinking about all the time I’m wasting.

IDF names 4 soldiers killed in Hezbollah drone strike on IDF base